I never want to forget this feeling so I am blogging about it!

I have not been this happy in 15 years…….since before my mom got sick.  Even then, not having been through any real trials in my life, I don’t think I had experienced pure JOY in Jesus Christ.  I look back over the past 15 years of my life and think of all the good and bad and I am in awe of God’s perfect plan. 

Let’s see where should I start…….my mom’s battle with brain cancer, watching her health deteriorate, watching her pass away, experiencing extreme grief, learning from her death, a miscarriage, then having our first child, experiencing the loss of a job twice in a row, re-establishing a life in Dallas, the Lord dropping the perfect job for Cliff in his lap, watching Cliff succeed in his new career, the loss of my grandpa, not having success with a second pregnancy, starting the adoption process, finding out we were pregnant, putting adoption on hold, having a child 11 weeks premature, knowing that it was a miracle I even went to the doctor that day, seeing the doctors save his life after 5 minutes of not breathing, choosing to have our 2 pound /29 week baby have heart surgery, seeing him make a miraculous turnaround after trusting God with that decision, finally bringing him home, having Logan rushed to the hospital after nearly losing him to a choking incident, having him diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy , accepting that we have a child with special needs, going through hours and hours of therapy, being told it may be a misdiagnosis, and then experiencing his miracle healing. 

I am tired just thinking about the past two years alone and these are just the ones that stick out in my mind.  We have had so many trials and so many joyous occasions and answers to prayers.  I just wanted to share them with you so you can see how God has been so good to our family!  I feel healed more than Logan.  After years of depression and anxiety, I can honestly say I am content and happy.  This is something I can only attribute to God.  He has healed my heart through years of trials and finally deciding to just trust in HIM.  I am in tears just thinking about how He has worked in our lives over the past years just to get us to this point.  The crazy thing is that I would not change a thing!  My joy comes from seeing how God has worked in our lives.  My joy comes from within…..from Jesus

Not only has he carried us through this past couple of years, but he has brought so many wonderful people into our lives!  I am so thankful that in the midst of our trials, we found a wonderful church like Keystone with so many beautiful people!  So much of my inspiration came from the stories and encouragement of HIS people in my life.  Thank you Lord that Your people are fearfully and wonderfully made!  I am grateful for each and every friend, old and new, that he has placed in my life! 

My prayer is that I can be an encouragement to all those who are in the midst of a trial.  I remind you.……”This too will pass”!  It really does pass and the joy on the other side is like no other.  If you are experiencing loss, sickness, unemployment, infertility, or whatever else it may be, know that God has His hand in it all and He has a perfect plan for your life.  He will carry you to the other side of your trial if you just put your trust in Him and Him alone.  So often we try to fix things ourselves and figure out what the “perfect plan” should be, but we are human and our plan does not even compare to the greatness of His ultimate plan!   It is such a great feeling to share my joy!  I hope this will encourage you to keep on trusting in Him and learning from your struggles because there is a reason for everything!  God has a plan for you too! 

Just a few details about our MIRACLE!

Things Logan can do now that he could not do just a little over a month ago before his medicine:

Run without falling.

Squat down for an extended period of time without falling over or losing his balance.

Walk the balance beam at the therapy gym without falling off.

Jump with bended knees and not lose his balance.

Jump off ledges, chairs, and other furniture without help and still land on his feet.  (Is that bad I let him jump off the furniture?)

DANCE! DANCE! DANCE!  (We love this one!)

Wake up loose and without tremors. (This is a HUGE one! He used to wake up stiff as a board and shake for long periods of time.)

Eat using utensils with ease.

Put together puzzles and play with his toys without struggling or getting frustrated. (He still has his moments of frustration, but nothing like before.  He is so much more controlled.)

Speak in 2-3 word phrases.   (Before, we were lucky to get 1-3 words total out of him at speech therapy sessions.)

Mimic what we say and respond to our questions with an appropriate answer.

Go up and down the stairs without holding the rail.  (He was crawling up and down before.)

Sleep through the night EVERY night without waking up until 9:00am.  Mommy likes this one! (Before, he would wake up in the middle of the night at least 2-3 times a week for hours at a time.  He would thrash around in his crib and cry for hours until I could calm him down enough to go back to bed.) 

This smile speaks volumes!  It is infectious!

Praise God From Whom all Blessings Flow!

Today was the day that we finally got the results from Logan’s Neurologist, Dr. Marks.  I will spare you all the details about his neurotransmitter and MRI results and just tell you what matters.  Logan DOES have Dopa-Responsive Dystonia (DRD).  Logan is responding incredibly to the medication used to reverse the symptoms of DRD.  While the MRI results did show possible signs of Cerebral Palsy from his brain bleed at birth, the CP is so mild, it is almost non-existent with the medication.  However, the doctor will keep Logan’s diagnosis as mild CP with DRD simply because it qualifies him for more medical programs.  For example, his therapy would not be covered by insurance under a DRD or developmental delay diagnosis.  He will also qualify for the early childhood program at Keller ISD with the medical CP diagnosis.  We will re access the situation in May, but as for now his treatment will remain the same.  They have increased his medication in hopes of even better results.  So far we have not seen any negative side effects.  Praise God for that!   

Dr. Marks was astounded by the vast improvement in Logan’s spasticity compared to just a few months ago.  In fact, he adjusted it on the charts to normal!  It was so incredible to see the amazement on the faces of the neurologists and office staff as they watched Logan run up and down the halls.  Dr. Marks called it a “medical miracle”.  His partner said it was “unbelievable”, as he was filled in on the results of Logan’s tests.  All I could do was smile with tears in my eyes and think to myself......”No, it’s not unbelievable.  We believed!  We had faith!.......And yes, it is a miracle! GOD’S miracle!” 

It has been a long month waiting for the results and I started to get discouraged and think maybe I was just imagining the improvements.  A few weeks ago, we received word from the nurse that his MRI showed signs of CP but that the rest of the results were still pending.  Naturally, I began to think the worst and I got a little disappointed.  However, after seeing the doctor today my joy has returned!  I am more than elated with all the positive feedback from the doctors.  Today was such an encouraging and wonderful day!  We have not had many of these days when it comes to doctor visits and test results.  What an awesome feeling to leave with so much JOY!

I am trying to find the words to express our excitement, but there really are no words.  This is HUGE and there just is nothing we can say to express or explain our graditude.  So for now, we will just hug and love on our miracle baby and his big brother, cry tears of joy, and praise GOD from whom all blessings flow.  This is one of those moments that you look to the heavens and KNOW THAT HE IS GOD and HE IS REAL!  Thank you, Lord!